Wherever You Are: A Memoir of Love, Marriage, and Brain Injury by Cynthia Lim
Title: Wherever You Are: A Memoir of Love, Marriage, and Brain Injury
Author: Cynthia Lim
Format: Paperback
Publisher: Camel Press
Publish Date: September 1, 2018
Source: Publisher
What's the Story?:
From Goodreads.com: "Cynthia Lim thought she had the perfect life: a husband who was a successful attorney, a fulfilling career in education, two teenage sons in private school, and a home in Los Angeles rich in books, music, and art. Then in 2003, her husband Perry suffers a cardiac arrest and brain injury, lingering in a coma for ten days before slowly awakening. A different person emerges, one who has lost his short-term memory and is fully dependent on others. Married for twenty years, she doesn't know how much of his former self will return as she fights for the treatment and care he needs.
She struggles with caregiving and working full-time while finding connection with the man she once knew and loved, whose brain will never again function as it did before. While wrestling with the urge to leave him in an institution and walk away, she discovers the strength and resolve that will allow her to build a new life. Wherever You Are is the story of a marriage after a spouse is forever changed by a catastrophic event. It is a story of redefining life with disability and discovering the real truth of love and marriage."
My Two Cents:
In "Wherever You Are," Cynthia Lim and her husband seem to lead a pretty good life. When a sudden health situation leaves her husband with a brain injury where one of the major symptoms severe short term memory loss, Lim discovers her own resilience and strength to come to terms with her and her husband's "new normal." This is a powerful memoir!
This memoir goes through everything that Cynthia and Perry, her husband, go through. Everything is covered from what happened to Perry to Cynthia having to navigate a new life and figure out how best she can care for her beloved husband. Caretaking is a very difficult job under any circumstances but Lim captures how difficult it is to be a caretaker for someone who once was self-sufficient. Lim also has to learn to be a partner to someone with whom she once had a very equal partnership with but that is no longer possible.
The writing is good. This is a hard subject and I did find myself wanting more detail on thoughts and feelings happening throughout the events in the book rather than just what was happening. This is a heart-wrenching story and I think it will be helpful to so many to have such a great example of strength!